Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Regrets and Nutshells

So I am sitting here staring at the screen trying to figure out where to begin. I cannot even begin to tell you the number of times I have done that throughout the months, but have been somewhat hesitant to write. Why? I have no idea. Maybe I just didn't think I had anything good to say. This is where the "regret" comes into play.

I know that I shouldn't focus on regrets and such in life, but I will focus a little on this one because I really wish I had taken the time to keep my family and friends updated on what's been happening in my life over the past several months. Well, now I am at a point where I want to share...ha! I need to share. There are so many changes, so many things going on, and this is the perfect outlet, at least for me.

Thus, the nutshell begins...

It is now mid-June 2009, and I cannot even believe it! It's been over 6 years since I graduated from college (university for all of you international friends), and just about 10 years since I graduated from high school! I can hardly believe it. It's been really neat to re-connect with people from the past through profile websites such as Facebook. I really enjoy learning about where people have ended up, what they're doing, if they're married, how many kids they have, etc. I just remember yesterday being in high school, tranferring from Baker to CNS, adjusting to a new place, new school, new everything. I also can never and will never forget my 4 life-changing years at RWC where I have been some of my greatest friends and have undergone some of my greatest trials.

Life surely has been a whirlwind. Looking back, it's just amazing that THIS is where I am in life right now. My sister just had her first child, a beautiful baby girl named Emma. My other two sisters will be graduating from high school in the next week and a half. My brother will be turning 14 years old, and I am approaching closer and closer to 30. Yikes!

Now, I am sure many of you are maybe wondering what's been going on in my life for the past 10 years. Well, I would love to touch on those points in the future, but for now, I will disclose a bit about the past few months.

Guido and I will be married 8 months on the 28th of June! Can you believe it? I can...barely. The time has just flown by, and it's been quite the 8 months so far. Being in an intercultural relationship has been quite a challenge and learning experience for both of us, but it's also been so wonderful as we're going through this journey of discovery of self-discovery individually and together. I don't just say this to win brownie points, but I mean it from the bottom of my heart that my husband is truly a gift from God, and I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world...well, maybe sometimes. Kidding!

To celebrate our journey so far, we decided last-minute to book a trip to Mallorca, Spain. We're really looking forward to this time of rest that we so desperately need. We have decided to view this time away as a second honeymoon of sorts. As some of you know, we wed just outside of Las Vegas last October, and only had a week there, which was really too short of a time. We got married on a Tuesday, had to arrange all kinds of paperwork on 3 other days, and with all of the preparations and emotions, it was just too short of a time. Next we knew, we were on a plane back to Europe, and my life would pick up and start over yet again.

For those of you who don't know, I have not been legally been able to have a job here in the Netherlands until my visa is approved. So, for the past 8 months, I have been a housewife. Do I have regrets? No way. Has it always been easy? Nope! Through it all, I will say that I have grown alot and learned so much about myself. I have had to overcome some fears and learn to be true to myself. This is something that continues everyday. I will comment, though, that just last Friday, I went to The Hague with my sister-in-law to pick up my visa card so now I am able to legally live and work here. Praise God!

Oh yeah, back to the 8 months of hibernation. It's been unreal. I will definitely have to touch on this amazing time through a series of blogs, but just to say that God has really had me in such a season of healing and restoration. It's been so good. Difficult, but good.

I am totally at a point of transition right now. Well, not just myself, but Guido as well. We have been seeking the Lord for direction and wisdom in so many things, and we praise God that things are finally beginning to come together...with a price. I have learned a life-long lesson that breakthrough never comes without a price. People get so scared by that statement, but the price we have to pay is so so good and so worth it.

The changes have never stopped, I guess. It's like someone threw me into a dryer, and turned it on, and I am still inside. Moving to another country, being married (again), being away from family and friends, adjusting to a new culture, taking on new roles, being the proud owner of a puppy named Zaccheus, and's been quite a price, but a great one. If I had to do it all over again, would I? Without question, yes.


Innocence Underrated said...

one blog every 9 months doesn't cut it.

Jess said...

yeah yeah yeah...i know. i am horrible with blogging these days. also with emails. it's sad. haha.